Welcome to Planet Willard: Michigan's Wayward Son Mitt Romney to Rule His Own World

Willard “Mitt” Romney is on his way to greatness, as a current Church of Latter Day Saints (LDS) “saint” in good standing.

Whether he loses his bid to become president of the United States and the platform that provides to promote the cult of Mormon or not.  Even if Mitt should lose his some $250 million in his Bain-based assets, Mitt will still be, without doubt, the lord and godlike master of his own planet - Planet Willard - somewhere out there in the great Mormon created, fictional celestial beyond. 

So Don’t Cry for Romney, Righteous America...

“After death, a good Mormon man who has followed a few certain rules is catapulted to this same status and receives his own planet to populate and rule over."

To receive this honor, a man must be "married for eternity" in the Mormon temple. This special marriage is binding after death as well as until it.

“’Celestial’ marriage, as this eternal marriage is often called, is essential for Mormon women. Without being celestially married to a holder of the priesthood, a woman cannot be 'saved'.”

Source: Austin and Fife, Alta Saints of Sage and Saddle. Salt Lake City, University of Utah Press (1980)

“Mary Ettie Smith, a Mormon woman who left the church and Utah in 1856, said that ‘women do not amount to much in themselves,’ and that women in those times were often celestially married to men they had no intention of ever living with, so that they could have a man who would be able to get them into heaven."

Source: Green, N. W. Mormonism: Its Rise, Progress, and Present Condition, Embracing the Narrative of Mrs. Mary Ettie Smith. Hartford, Belknap & Bliss (1870)

So Mavens for Mitt, all you evangelical born-again Christian women for Romney, join up with the Latter Day Saints and get and wear your special Mormon underwear.  If you’re exceptionally lucky, you may spend unending eternity with your Lord and Master Mitt on his own far - off Planet Willard.

How divine? Seriously… How ludicrous and silly?  An orthodox Christian belief?

... Not on your eternal soul!

Disclaimer: This is in response to a number of recent evangelical endorsements of Mitt Romney, despite decades of attacks on Mormonism by the religious right, and not meant to be an attack on the LDS or infringe on the right of any American to freely practice their own faith.


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